Halls of Waiting – a modern myth

It came to pass that those who entered the Halls of Belatonos each year with Rigantona began to wait in the area outside the gates of bone rather than wander the lands beyond and beneath.  In time they began to tend that land outside the walls of Belatonos.  Meanwhile in the Land above and beyond people began to forget that their dead needed to pay a price to enter the halls of Belatonos and more and more were turned away from the gates of bone.

The first ones who had entered with Rigantona for the dark time of the year went to Belatonos and agreed with him that they would raise some of his cattle outside his walls and in return some of the livestock would be theirs to keep.  And so it was that in time the Halls of Waiting were formed.  And those who were turned away from the gates of bone began to live more and more in the Halls of Waiting.  There were some who chose to stay in these Halls of Waiting always to guide and advise others who came there.  Some chose to enter the Halls of Belatonos each year with Rigantona and live the other part of the year in the Halls of Waiting.  Still others chose the path of rebirth after a time in the Halls of Waiting.

So it was that while the Halls of Belantonos remained the same, the Halls of Waiting grew and changed.

Death and the continuity of the self

Recently I have been musing about death and existence beyond it. For as long asI can remember I have believed in the existence of something beyond this life we live and yet…

And yet I have nothing really that reinforces this belief. I have sometimes felt that I can feel presences around me of those I have known and loved who have died but is that just wishful thinking? I’ve never received any kind of clear message that confirms that there are ancestral spirits around me.

I like the idea of reincarnation in some shape or form but I have no explanation of how it might work. Apart from one strange instance where I either remembered being a tree or simply saw myself as one for a brief moment in time I have nothing really concrete to support the feeling that I may have walked this world before. I know some poeple that have experienced memories in regression that make them certain that they have lived before but for myself I am uncomfortable with the idea of regression. I think that even if I did seem to remember something I would always wonder if it was real or just my imagination fueled by the many fiction books I have read.

On my way home yesterday on the bus I was thinking about these things for what is probably the millionth time at least and I finally came to understand that it doesn’t really matter.

If I live beyond this life in some way I probably will not remember this life just as now I have no memory of any past experience. I have some knowledge of some of my ancestors, they live on in my blood and my limited memories of them. I have the precious knowledge of my own blood descendants, my children. If I can pass on stories of family members that they will never know to them then in some small way those people will live on. If, in their turn, they have children and pass stories of previous generations on then I will live on not only in their blood but in their memories.

I will never know for certain if there is anything else but it doesn’t matter to me any more (or rather that I will never really know the answer no longer matters I will simply carry on believing that there is more to existence than this life). What matters is my blood and something of my story. This is my legacy to the future just as my blood and the stories of my ancestors are my inheritance.